The End of the Begging..

Hello, and welcome wow my first post. I honestly don't know why I never gave into blogging years ago. I always thought I never had time to keep things updated. But in reality the free time I do have  I spend it on the computer lol. Well, I welcome you to Edwin's spot. Intended to build a list of loyal subscriber’s who share a common interest. 


Im a some what open person I like to express what I feel and why I feel the way I feel. Im loving caring and somewhat mature.  Maybe then the average 21. I do have a list of things I need to mature but with life and its adventures im sure i will overcome that. 


Wow, Good-Bye 2009! Hello 2010. 


This year wow, I sit back and so much rushes through my mind. Ive met some really aweful people this year but I do believe of things happening for a reason. God placed me in there paths for reasons. Maybe to learn more about myself and to learn more about how cruel other people can be. I also put myself in some bad situations were honestly I was kind of afraid for my life. But again things happens for reasons.


But, i too met so many great friends this year. Some older friends that were lost and i recovered them lol and we got closer. Also, new ones that now we are building a friendship like no other. 


*Im just writing whatever comes to my head =)


Talking about meeting great people. Halloween Weekend 10-30-09 I met a great guy. Ok, let me give you some history growing up my parentals never let me go out on halloween and dress up we did get to pass out candy and blah blah but never did we go out. So I have been accustomed to not going out. Even as i moved out on my own i have never gave interest to going out halloween. Weird i know .. But this year i did. and let me tell you i met a great guy in the process. His name is Ben. Ben was visiting in with friends. I Honestly had my eyes on him prior to actually seeing him in person. Well, we hit it off. I was drunk and so was he. A mutual friend introduced us. I actually couldnt stop staring at the guy. Somehow we all three ended up on the dance floor. Dancing away .. i was trying to dance all sexy too try to impress him trying to get his attention. And it worked hahaa... as he leaned over and told me "I like your mohawk"... (aww) He liked my mohawk i was thrilled and on cloud nine let me tell you. Well Enuff said Ben is a great guy we clicked and we have been enjoying each other since then. I understand him, and he understands me. We talk and talk and sometimes i talk to him more than he wants but hes a great listener. Im so glad and excited for having him in my life. 


Ive had a struggle with my dad. My dad (grandpa) suffers from high blood pressure, gout in his feet, he's diabetic, has had 1 open heart surgery, 2 strokes and a heart attack. Well, my dad suffers from alot. I hold him dearly to my heart. He has raised me to be the man I am and will always treasure him and our memories. I know god is calling his name and wants to take him from us so he dont hurt no more. But some of us dont want to let go. But as i sit here and express this thoughts it hurts me to see my dad suffer, he was the always the macho never gave up type of guy. But this year he has suffered so much. I love you daddy! I will always carry you in the pocket heart like you told me im in. 


My other family members are doing great sisters, brothers, nieces, nephews, cousins, and the list goes on. Its been a minute since I went down to my hometown. Avenal as its called lol a small town infested with drugs, gangs, violence, and dreams. I say dreams because i come from there and with dreams ive have hoped to one day accomplish. 


Wow, i guess i can go on for days but i might say ill leave it for the next posting. Hopefully ending the 2009 year with a bang! Thanks for reading 


Always, Edwin Alex Barrera